After returning from the Life Focus Journey, Nathaniel joyfully shared how God took the knowledge he had in his head and brought it down to his heart.
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In my last post, I wrote on how the Lord had cleansed me from worldly music. He did. However, it was only another step through the door of true understanding. Although there was a new found resolve in my heart from the vow I made to the Lord, I felt as though I was still putting forth most of the effort in every area of my life and spiritual maturity.
It was like a shadow on the wall of my heart. No matter where I went, I couldn’t get away from it, and trying to wipe a 
shadow from a wall doesn’t work. This shadow was not specific unconfessed sins, but rather the core of who I was illuminated by God’s Word. Stopping the Light of God from purifying me completely, this darkness of self led me into deeper and deeper misery.
In my outward life, things were actually going the best they ever had. The Lord had cleansed me from a stronghold, I was striving for righteousness, and I felt confident that I was doing what the Lord wanted me to do. But there was still the shadow. When I wouldn’t get up for devotions, a sweep of hate would fall upon me—a hatred of myself. I wanted to kill myself. “Either Christianity is miserable or it isn’t real.” That is where my thoughts often directed themselves. When the ever-looming fact of my inadequacy to please God would continue to present itself, I would continue to run back to what I believed, to what I had done to prove that I was God’s child.
Truly, everything good is the work of the Lord. It comes only from His mighty grace which flows from His heart of love—the Life of Jesus. In my pathetic state of strong-willed iniquity, God still sought me. The Lord kept knocking—calling to me tenderly. All He wanted me to do was open the door, see who I really was, confess my absolute inadequacy, and let Him and His goodness fully into my heart.
O how we are blessed with a God that pursues us diligently! On my knees—powerless, hopeless, and defeated—I opened the door. When the genuinely evil motives of my self-righteous heart were revealed, God poured down His grace from heaven and glory filled my soul.
At first I felt no different, but knowledge of the truth of His Word in my heart grew. By that night I couldn’t sleep for the joy that was burning in me. In the morning, when the pure excitement of true salvation began to sink in, I noticed something else. No shadow. I had it all backwards. This was never my own journey to my heart. It was God’s journey to my heart! And now, “It is finished.” He has won and cleansed me. I am His. And now the journey of Christ in me, which I knew nothing about, begins.
~ Tim
June 2008 Guys’ Journey
When I surrendered everything to God, including my success, it was like a burden was lifted off of me. I no longer had to drain myself because God, through Christ, would give me strength to be successful in what He wanted me to do. I only have to “seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness.”
~ Austin
June 2008 Guys Journey
I was taken sick in December 2006 and could eat nothing but bread and crackers. After several weeks I began to eat more but then my health crashed again. That cycle went on for over a year. I had no energy and I couldn’t do anything active outside.
Then, on the Journey to the Heart, my team studied what God’s Word says about a fearful heart. I realized that my inability to eat was predominately caused by a deep-rooted fear that my stomach would be in intense pain as a result of eating.
I wrote out a list of about eight benefits that God intended for me by allowing this illness. For example, I realized that my sickness had allowed me to spend more time with certain people and get to know them better, whereas when I was well I would be outside by myself and not spending time with others. Another blessing was that I had learned to better communicate my thoughts and feelings. As I wrote out this list of benefits, I was able to fully surrender my health to the Lord and I experienced a tremendous joy!
When God took away my fear, I was able to eat a wider variety of food and I discovered that nothing bad happened! Now I can eat almost anything without pain and run and play games that I couldn’t for over a year. My family and I have seen an amazing jump in my health. I had prayed many times, and tried to surrender myself to God, but I had no results until I wrote out the benefits for my illness. Then I had true joy!!
~ Elizabeth
April 2008 Girls Journey
8/24 UPDATE: I have steadily improved and have seen the Lord’s hand providing healing. May Jesus Christ be praised!
The trip truly was a journey deep into my heart, exposing all of the dark closets to the Light of Christ. As a result, I have never had more joy and passion for serving Christ—with my whole heart. When I cleared my heart of every affection that was competing with Christ and fully surrendered everything to Him, I was overwhelmed with a sense of peace and love as nothing stood in between our relationship.
So many exciting, incredible things happened on the Journey, but the three most important to me were the hours of close fellowship with like-minded believers, the close fellowship I experienced with our awesome God, and the extra power I received through the anointing and laying on of hands.
The anointing for greater works and the laying on of hands has given me an amazing boldness and power to share God’s love with others. Before, I would have been so intimidated to approach strangers and share the love of Jesus, but now I am excited to talk with others.
God is bringing into my life so many to whom I can witness and disciple. I have set my goal of disciples to two million, and I am sure through God’s grace I can reach it! Thank you Mr. Gothard for giving of yourself for me and so many others. You have had a tremendous impact on my life and I pray that God would allow me to do the same!
~ Timothy
June 2008 Guys Journey
When I first arrived at the Journey, I felt pretty out of touch with God. I wasn’t spending time in His Word and I thought God would never speak to me. I also was listening to rock music and watching a lot of worldly movies as well as struggling with impure thoughts. I was walking with the world and not like a Christian. I tried reading the Bible more but the cares of the world were always choking it out.
I had to surrender the desire for the approval of the world as well as the pleasures of sin. I have to chose the narrow way. God doesn’t want me to look like the world. I decided to give up movies and music of the world and all competing affections that came between between me and God.
I heard from God on this Journey. God revealed to me that I needed to be spending significantly more time in His Word. How can I witness to other people if I don’t even have my own salvation nailed down and confirmed with scripture? God can’t speak to me unless I am listening.
Overall, I had a great Journey and God blessed our time. Thank you!
~ Ryan
June 2008 Guys’ Journey
The fourth week of the Fall 2008 Life FOCUS program was spent in the Northwoods of upper Michigan on a “Journey to the Heart” …
The distant rising sun was only just peeking up upon the cool, The frosty Northwoods Conference Center frost blanketed morning as our group of 20 arose early Tuesday morning …©2008 Robert Staddon. Design by Abundant Designs
