Living the Journey

Harboring inner rebellion and entertaining a secret relationship with a guy I knew my parents would never approve of, I made plans to move out the day I turned eighteen. Deep inside I knew what I was doing was not right and God would not bless me for this, but I stuffed it down for a false hope that I would be satisfied with my boyfriend rather than the Lord. However, I was hurting my family and myself by refusing God’s best. After the third month of this horrible lifestyle, my parents told me to pack my bags and then they dropped me off at the IBLP Headquarters. I was so upset and determined I would not change, but God had different plans.

After working on staff for three months, I attended my second Journey to the Heart. I seemed fine to everyone around me but inside that battle was raging. I wanted my own way and my own plans, but I couldn’t argue with the genuineness of those around me. Their love for the Lord, their surrendered lifestyle, their true joy that only comes from the Lord, and their satisfaction in Him placed before me a choice: me or God. I couldn’t go any longer! I broke and surrendered. I confessed everything to my parents, which was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life! But it was worth it because the strength of sin is in its secrecy!

Confessing to my parents and turning away from my sin gave me a new humility, which I wouldn’t trade for anything! I have a new freedom and joy I never knew and now I love the Lord more than anything and am willing to serve Him with all that I am. I am truly satisfied, because He is all I need or could ever want!

~ Anna

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When I came on the Journey to the Heart my goal was to draw closer to God. I thought I was a pretty good person and didn’t really need to study the wrong heart attitudes. But God knew differently, and He really convicted me of my pride towards my siblings. I had thought I was so much better then them and made them respect me by my unkind words. I would pray asking God to change my siblings. I asked God to humble them and take their pride away, but wasn’t willing myself to ask forgiveness and make things right.

I was on my face before God with my team and we were all confessing sins. God just totally convicted me and opened my eyes to how by my pride I had caused deep wounds. I cried out to God to forgive me and asked Him to keep my intellect from ruling my life and instead allow Him to be on the throne. It was very humbling to tell the other girls on my team how prideful I had been. God then was able to show me why I had the fear of rejection in my life and I was able through Scripture to conquer that fear. He also gave me a new freedom in Him I had never had before. My devotions before I came had been dry and like a routine, but now I am excited to talk with Him every morning and receive many new insights from His Word.

~ Kaye
June 2008 Girls’ Journey

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