For three nights in a row last week, I would wake up having dreamed about being attacked by someone or something. One night, I woke up startled from one of these dreams and gripped with a fear of my future as well as a fear of pain or getting hurt. I knew that God did not want me to live in or sleep with these fears and dreams, but how could I get rid of them? I didn’t know.

The next morning, Mr. Gothard called a few of us into his office for a time of prayer. He asked around the little group to see if any of us had any prayer requests. For a moment, I didn’t want to say anything. I thought, “Hey; these people would hear what I was struggling with!” But God prompted me to go ahead and ask them to pray for me.

Mr. Gothard seized the opportunity to impart some wisdom and explained several simple truths. He first asked if I had ever dedicated my life to God, to which I answered “yes”. He then explained that because my body belonged to God, Satan could not attack me in any way that God did not allow. He also mentioned that if I ever were to be attacked, that I should just cry out to God, and He would protect me according to Psalm 50:15: “Call upon me in the day of trouble: I will deliver thee, and thou shalt glorify me.”

Mr. Gothard shared how when he was younger, he purposed to die for God. He didn’t care how or when, but knew that when he died, it was going to be God’s appointed time and way. He encouraged me to do the same thing.

That night I knelt down beside my bed and rededicated my body to God. I told God that I was willing and ready to die for Him. I also prayed out loud and completely gave God my sleep. Then I prayed that if it was His Will, I would be able to rest well and wake up whenever He wanted me to. And finally, I prayed that I would be able to get something good out of my Bible time the next morning. With that, I rolled over and fell into a deep sleep.

I woke up with my alarm at six ‘o-clock the next morning . . .  refreshed! And I don’t remember even waking up at all after I asked God for sleep. I got out of bed, and started reading through a part of Psalm 119. As I was reading through the verses, one stood out to me which I took for my rhema that day. It was Psalm 119:37 and says, “Turn away mine eyes from beholding vanity; and quicken thou me in thy way.” My challenge now is to live out this rhema by looking continually towards the Lord instead of being distracted by anything that does not bring about an eternal impact!

When I cried out to the Lord, He answered me. It has now been over a week and none of those fears have come back!

I now know that if I am ever struggling with doubts, fears, or anything else, I can bring it to Him in prayer. The well known and deeply loved hymn, What a Friend We Have in Jesus, expresses this so well:

“What a Friend we have in Jesus, all our sins and griefs to bear!
What a privilege to carry everything to God in prayer!
O what peace we often forfeit, O what needless pain we bear,
All because we do not carry everything to God in prayer.

~ Katie
September 2010 Girls’ Journey

After the Journey to the Heart, when I came back home, I started seeking to reverse my past weakness and start sharing the Gospel with others. When that didn’t happen as soon and as easily as I had expected, I was tempted to get discouraged. But instead, I remembered that God will only use us when we’re “hot”. Last week, I was asked by a leader at our church to lead devotions at our weekly staff meeting. I felt led to talk about Revelation 3:15,16 and I was making the point that God will only use us as long as we are spiritually “hot”. So in order to practice what I preach, I made an effort the rest of the week to remain usable and “hot” for God.

The very next day, I was at my church when I saw four kids, around 8-10, playing around in the fountain. It turns out that they were from nearby apartments and had never heard about God’s plan for salvation. When I asked them to get out of the fountain, they asked me what the empty tomb (a replica of the tomb Jesus was supposedly buried in) was for. So I had the amazing opportunity to share the story of Jesus’ life, death, burial and resurrection with them. And after I finished telling them about the way to be saved, they all wanted to ask Jesus to be their Savior! It blew me away that God could use me to impact those kids’ lives!

What also blew me away is that I did none of this on my own. When I put aside my weakness in speaking to others about God, I was able to be used by God to advance His Kingdom! God says in Exodus 4:12 “I will be with your mouth, and teach you what you are to say.” Regardless of the fact that I did not know what to say, God spoke through my mouth to those boys. When I rendered myself usable for God, only then was I able to share with those boys.

~ Luke
April 2010 Guys Journey

He briefly shares this testimony in the following audio clip.

Download audio file (Testimony_201004_Luke.mp3)
Download MP3 (3.5 min)

~ Luke
April 2010 Journey

Download audio file (Testimony_201004_Henry.mp3)
Download MP3 (3 min)

~ Henry
April 2010 Journey

It started at home, checking with my family members to see if my conscience really was clear toward them. It went to a new level at the airport when obstacles started coming up. Two other girls and I were traveling together and when one of them couldn’t go through security because of ID, she wanted to stop right there in the crowded security line and pray. Okay, Lord, I asked You for humility . . . . Seeing Him work in everyday circumstances was not new to me, but praying out loud in a public place was. Though several more problems came up, we watched the Lord answer prayer and smooth them all out.

At the first session, someone spoke about the sin of the fear of man. Fear of man has always been a problem for me, but I don’t remember ever hearing it classified as a sin! The next morning I was reading my Bible in the living room, and one other girl from my team was seated on the far side of the room doing the same thing. God suddenly laid on my heart that He wanted me to confess the sin of the fear of man—out loud. So I whispered a prayer of confession. “Louder,” He said. I tried again, still in a whisper. “Louder!” “But she’ll hear me!” I answered. It was a struggle that lasted several minutes.

I knew if I didn’t obey in one thing, then the whole week would be wasted. Anything I hoped to learn about loving God would mean nothing if I wasn’t willing to obey Him in everything. So at last, with His grace, I went over and asked the other girl to pray with me so that I could confess this sin with my mouth out loud to the Lord.

Listening to a sermon by Paul Washer later that week, God convicted me about some forms of entertainment that had become idols for me. That night when the team met, we experienced an amazing time of prayer, and only the first of many. There is nothing in this world like praying with a group of believers who all just want to be honest and open before God and to know Him more than anything else. It is worth the humbling, the confessions, and the tears.

During the Journey, I was given a great deal of time to just get alone with God—and I do mean alone. No telephone, no laundry, no computer, no work or church schedule, no little children (as much as I love them, they are distractions!) There just aren’t that many opportunities for quietness and aloneness in this world, and that was a great blessing.

Most importantly, I learned all over again that loving God takes complete dedication. You don’t add loving God to your list of things to do—that is the one thing to focus on, because it takes all of you. That means approaching my daily responsibilities and opportunities with the attitude of “how can I do this thing unto my Lord?”

~ Kelli
March 2010 Journey

Listen to Kelli share part of her testimony:Download audio file (Testimony_201003_Kelli.mp3)
Download MP3 (2 min)

One night, our team experienced intense spiritual warfare and we sensed that Satan was attacking us with fear. I got on my knees with the rest of my group and earnestly cried out to God to take away my fear. The amazing happened. I immediately felt a peace, a freedom, and a joy inside! I was thrilled! I felt so free from that bondage!

I did not at all expect the tremendous results that would come. In the days, months, and years that followed, God opened up so many opportunities to make an eternal impact in the lives of others. I was able to reach out to others and talk to them without fear of what they thought of me. It was incredible! I was free to do God’s will. Free to be used for His service. Free to obey the Holy Spirit’s promptings. It grieved me to see how, for so many years, my fear had hindered me from being used of God; from being an available vessel for Him. How many opportunities I must have missed to reach into the lives of others, all because of my fear of man.

Never would I have dreamed that exactly two years and one day after I attended the Journey, I would board a plane for Oklahoma to spend ten weeks making an impact in the lives of many children there. During our heart preparation at Eagle Springs, God again convicted me of my fear of man. I was challenged to live AUG – Approved Unto God. (See Proverbs 29:25, II Timothy 2:15.)

One day before Bible club, I noticed a girl sitting alone while everyone else was playing. Upon going over to talk to her, I asked what the best thing was that had happened to her that day. Without missing a beat, she said, “When the church people came.” (We would go door-to-door picking up the kids for club. This girl evidently viewed us as ‘church people’.) I was caught by surprise as I was certainly not expecting that as an answer! For some of the kids, we were their only hope of something better. We were the bright spot in their day. We were the ones that cared enough to love and reach out to them with the love of Christ. Had I had a fear of man, I would have pushed away the Holy Spirit’s prompting and would have lost an opportunity to share His love with this girl.

As I further talked with her, I discovered that she was rejected by her friends at school and was very hurt by that. I was able to share with her from personal experience how I had found a true Friend in Jesus. The very next week, this little girl was gloriously saved! Through all the training, the work, the loss of sleep, and inconveniences, nothing can be compared to the rewards of investing in these young lives. I can truly say it was worth it all!

My time in Oklahoma teaching truth in the public schools and doing after-school Bible clubs was a growing time and a stretching experience. When I stop relying on God and fail to look to Him alone for approval, I soon fear man rather than the Maker.

God is continuing to do a work in my heart. What I experienced on my Journey was not a one-time thing. It is an on-going process. My Maker is continuing to mold me and develop in me His perfect love that casts away all fear.

~ Sarah
September 2007 Journey

~

If you are interested in an opportunity to invest in the lives of children, please send a quick note to Chad Christiansen.

In Bill Gothard’s Basic Seminar, he describes a new perspective on fully dedicating your life to Christ. He uses the illustration of a room with everything inside representing the things that you do in your life. This might include each activity you have become involved in or every subject that you’ve mastered. In this illustration, when you become a new Christian and dedicate your “life” to Christ, it is like you are  inviting Him to come into the room and allowing Him the freedom to have control of all the aspects of your life. Let’s say there is a box in the room for each of your accomplishments. If there is something that you want to hold on to and don’t want you new Roommate to know about or take away, you might build a closet, put the box on the top shelf out of reach, and lock the door. Then, you really aren’t giving God everything because you are still withholding that one little box in your closet!

As I was searching my heart, trying to figure out if there was any particular area in my life that I had not yet surrendered to God, He revealed to me an area where I had allowed myself to be in control. At first, I was unwilling to give this up because it wasn’t all bad. Just some of it was, so the good outweighs the bad and makes it ok to live with, right? Wrong!

I argued back and forth with God about it, and finally agreed to give it all to Him. I was able to discover that God wants to be the center of my life, and I need to be willing to let Him be in control of all aspects of my life, including my future.  The Lord showed me that He is my fulfillment; He is all that I will ever need to be happy. He also revealed to me that now is the perfect time for me to focus on serving the Lord through my current responsibilities.

I Corinthians 7:34-35 says – “The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband. And this I speak for your own profit; not that I may cast a snare upon you, but for that which is comely, and that ye may attend upon the Lord without distraction.”

These verses prompted me to rededicate myself to focus on serving the Lord rather than pleasing myself. That alone has been life-changing for me, and now I am able to fully trust God to care for everything I will ever need or want! As challenging as it was, after I completely surrendered everything to God, I was finally able to experience true peace in my spirit.

In closing, I will just share one of the verses that suck out to me during this time of my life: Psalm 126:2-3: “Then our mouth was filled with laughter and our tongue with joyful shouting; then they said among the nations, ‘The Lord has done great things for them.’ The Lord has done great things for us, and we are glad.” Yes, God has done an awesome work in my life, and I am very glad!

~ Grace
September 2009 Journey

I had all kinds of objections. One was, “I’m not qualified; I’ve never even been in a public school.” Another was, “I’m not worthy to teach character. I’m the last one to tell others about self-control and other character qualities.” A third was, “The kids will think I’m stupid.” Having all these fears, you can see why I was scared and uncertain when I came to Oklahoma. But I had decided to follow God’s leading.

While I was there, God did the impossible. He made me into someone who could teach and reach others for Him. He gave me a good relationship with Him. I cannot count the times I had no idea what to say in a situation, but after a short prayer, the words came to me. In Bible club, the Lord gave me two fifth grade boys that were trouble makers. I had no idea what I was going to do. I kept loving and praying for them and tried not to give up, but I was at my wits end with their annoying antics. Yet by the end of the year, they not only were cooperative, but they were listening and learning as well. My relationship with them is proof that I can trust God in any circumstance.

This is the greatest thing I learned there: I can trust God! Every time I had given something to God, I would end up taking it back: music, movies, TV, friends, you name it; I couldn’t seem to let anything go for good. I realized the reality was I didn’t believe God. I didn’t believe He was greater than all these worldly things or that He could make my life fun without them. But God proved to me that I could trust Him with everything in my life, and the end result would be greater then anything I could possibly have imagined.

Do I still make wrong choices and go back to old things? Yes. But my whole outlook has changed! I am learning things from the Bible I never knew, and my walk with God is better than it has ever been before. Going on the Journey was the first stepping stone to a whole new life, a life that was not ruled by my earthly desires, but by the Lord’s guidance and direction.

~ Paul
November 2007 Journey

~

If you are interested in an opportunity to invest in the lives of children, please send a quick note to Chad Christiansen.

Last year I wanted to be on a team of rebels. This year, I wanted a team of girls who all wanted to be there . . . and of course, I found out on both occasions, that God’s ways are opposite to ours, and that He knows the best thing for us.

Through a series of discipleship opportunities and many different occasions of praying for different girls, God helped me to overcome my fear of rejection from people and learn how to make Jesus my best friend. Not only did I learn how to love Jesus as a friend that sticks closer than a brother, but I learned how to disciple girls. That has been my dream ever since last year and I never had the courage to do it. I was always floating along with the tide, unable to swim against it. God gave me freedom over my fear of man on this Journey and filled me with a greater joy than ever before. Not only could I stand alone, I could do it with great joy.

During the course of the week, God answered some major prayer requests that I brought before Him and my team. He also gave me a greater love for my family and I missed them all even though I usually enjoy time to myself.

I want to be able to have an impact on girls outside of my family . . . so God laid it on my heart to first work on my ministry at home so that I will then be prepared to do that. Upon arriving home, I was overjoyed to find that my parents were giving me and my sister permission to gather a group of girls and return to the Journey in March/April. I am now looking forward to what God will do, who He will choose, and how He is going to use my life.

~ Hannah
September 2009 Girls Journey

When I was younger, there had also been a struggle between my parents in their marriage, which had caused me to cut off my spirit from them, to build up walls of defense, and to suffer asthma and nightmares from my fears. I had sought acceptance in other people and possessions, which had caused me to not only lack the trust I needed for my parents, but to hold back from fully trusting God.

The Breaking Point

As this realization dawned upon me, I broke down and wept on the floor where we had all knelt to pray in groups of 3 or 4. My team leader, sensing that God was doing a work in my heart, led me away to talk in private. Over the course of the next 2 hours, she helped me identify 30 lies I believed, 20 painful memories I was suffering from, and 5 different fears that were affecting my health.

That day my eyes were opened to the bondage that I had been in for so many years. I experienced a new freedom as I prayed asking God to take back the ground I had surrendered. I was able to fully forgive my offenders and to develop a new love for them, and a desire to serve and bless them!

Dying Leaves are More Beautiful

This amazing event set the stage for the rest of my Journey! I found that my heart was open to examination as I studied the different heart conditions. I was able to pray for others with a whole new love for them! I saw God use me to encourage and disciple many other girls throughout the time there, and to cry out to Him without fear of what others would think. There was a whole new awareness of His promptings, and the ability to hear His voice like never before! Most of all, I learned to understand the pain of others who were in similar bondage to what I had been in.

God showed me how to understand the hurts of another and to care for them! He broke me one night as I was spending time alone with Him under the stars. I wept for a girl I had known who was experiencing much more than I had ever experienced, but was held by the chains I had been in.

Throughout the week, as I observed the beauty of the colorful leaves on the trees, I was reminded continually by our team leader that the leaves were beautiful, yet they were dying! I saw that just as dying leaves are more beautiful than those that are alive, so we as believers are required to die to self and to be on fire for the Lord, in order to achieve the greatest beauty.

Just Three Days

As we prepared to leave journey and come back home, I was encouraged to go back and make disciples, to grow in the Lord, and to do great works for His kingdom. I could never have imagined just what awesome things God would do in so short a time!

The first full day back home, God brought a young lady across our path to meet with us regularly for discipleship. That same day, my sister and I decided that God would have us bring a team of girls we were discipling back to a journey next year. He has already provided several who are interested!

The second day proved to be a little more challenging. Mr. Garvin had taught us a valuable lesson on sharing the gospel with lost souls, shortly before the journey ended. We were at the park with some friends, when I decided to put to practice a little of what he had placed before us. In the past, I had always handed out tracts, and had actually shared the gospel with four little children and an older woman. Yet each time my conversation had never been more than just a few minutes long and I had always been so fearful during the whole presentation.

This time, however, I felt led to give a tract I had with me to a young man who was up on the hill smoking and texting on his cell phone. I was a little nervous, but I felt very strongly that God wanted me to do this. To my surprise, he was friendly and after handing him the tract and asking a few questions, we started a rather lengthy conversation. About 20 minutes later he started opening up and sharing about his life. He professed to be saved, but didn’t know much about the Bible at all, even to know if he was saved by works or by faith. I was able to share with him a lot about the Word, and to present 49 Commands of Christ to him. He became so interested that He wrote down the IBLP website so that he could check out some of the materials and learn more about the commands of Christ. He also showed much interest in attending our church!

I keep wondering what would have happened if I had disobeyed God’s voice and had failed to be a vessel through which His love could shine to someone so spiritually hungry.

The third day God impressed upon me this question: “If I don’t know the 49 commands of Christ and if I am not living them all out in obedience to Him, then how can I effectively teach them to those whom I am discipling?” That night I began to work on the first command and to apply it to my life.

As I went to bed, I prepared a passage of Scripture from Philippians 2 to quote and meditate upon. God gave me so many significant insights even as I was falling asleep that I could write down the next morning. He also showed me two books He wanted me to write concerning two areas of bondage that I have found freedom in.

As I went to sleep, I dreamed about a man of God who was competing in a race. And as he sought to do his best, God faithfully rewarded him by allowing him to win! When I woke up, there was a post on the Living the Journey website, about running our race successfully as a champion runner. It was like God reaffirmed to me that He has set the narrow way before me, and that now there is nothing holding me back from trusting Him fully and from running with all my strength to win!

When I was in bondage to bitterness, and when I chose to believe Satan’s lies, the chains kept me from running to win. But now I have been offered another chance to run without anything holding me back. God is so gracious and merciful! Even now He has already given me such a new heart for Him, so that when temptation comes (and it has been so less frequent) I can easily and victoriously overcome it by the strength of Jesus Christ!

Each person must come to a place where Jesus is everything to them. For me, this is just beginning!

~ Sarah
September 2009 Girls Journey